The Art of Connection

Questions are an essential part of human interaction – they connect us. Humans are fundamentally social creatures, and our need for connection is deeply ingrained in our biology and psychology.

From childhood, when we seek to understand and connect to the world around us, to adulthood, where questions spark conversations and exploration, questioning shapes our experiences – and grows our faith. This post will explore why asking questions is a natural human behavior and how it strengthens connections between people and between our God. Questioning God can be a healthy part of our faith journey.

My story – I wasn’t really allowed to question authority. As I matured, I finally recognized that questioning, better yet, asking good questions could be a valuable skill. I often wondered how to cultivate that “skill” – well I realized it would take time, practice, and a bit of courage…

The Importance of Questions in Human Development

From the moment we are born, our innate curiosity drives us to explore and ask questions, even if we do not verbalize them. This curiosity is vital for our development. For example, studies show that infants who are engaged through questions tend to develop stronger cognitive skills. By the age of two, children often ask dozens of questions each day, highlighting their desire to learn and connect with their surroundings.

Asking questions also fosters empathy by prompting us to consider others’ feelings. For instance, someone asking, “How did that make you feel?” shows genuine interest in another’s perspective, creating a sense of belonging and trust that is vital for healthy relationships.

Questioning God

This may seem counterintuitive but asking our Creator question deepens our understanding. When we ask God a question, we are actively engaging with our faith and seeking a deeper understanding of His character, His ways, and His will. Instead of passively accepting what we’ve been told, we’re wrestling with it and trying to make it our own. This can lead to profound insights and growth, as well as a deepening relationship with God. Jeremiah 33:3 says, “Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come.”

The Bible doesn’t shy away from people bringing their questions, doubts, and even complaints directly to God. However, there is an underlying tone in scripture that emphasizes humility and trust in God’s wisdom. While honest questions are often seen as a part of wrestling with faith, questioning with a rebellious or demanding spirit, or doubting God’s character, is portrayed differently.

It’s natural and even encouraged to bring our honest questions and struggles to God. He can handle our doubts and desires for understanding. These questions should come from a seeking truth and deepening our faith, our relationship with God, rather than questioning out of defiance and disbelief.

God may not always answer our questions in a way we expect or with the clarity we may desire, but He responds in ways that reveal His character and invites deeper trust.

Questions as a Tool for Connection

Humans are naturally social beings, and our ability to connect with others impacts our quality of life. Engaging someone starts with a question. Simple inquiries like “What’s your favorite movie?” or deeper ones about personal beliefs help to create a dialogue. Research indicates that conversations sparked by questions not only strengthen relationships but can also increase feelings of happiness by 20%.

Moreover, questions can help ease unfamiliar settings. For example, by asking, “What brought you here today?” can lead to shared interests and experiences, paving the way for meaningful conversations that highlight the common ground between individuals.

With God, come with sincerity and humility. Asking questions strengthens our faith -it reflects a desire for a relationship, to know God better. It’s an invitation for Him to speak into our lives and reveal more of Himself. Just like any relationship, asking questions shows we care and want to connect on a a deeper level. We must face our questions head-on vice ignoring them.

Be honest – let us share our genuine questions, even if it feels difficult or uncomfortable. God knows our heart, honesty creates a space for true connection. In Jeremiah 17:10 it states, “I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man” and in 1 Samuel 16:7 “…for the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” It doesn’t matter how you phrase things, say what you think you should ask.
Be open – approach the throne with a willingness to hear His perspective, even if it’s not what you expect. Connection involves a two-way flow, so we must be open to receiving as well as asking.
Be humble – Recognize that God’s understanding is far beyond our own. Our questions are valid, but be prepared that the answers might not fit neatly into our current framework. Humility allows for growth and deeper understanding.

The Art of Asking the Right Questions

Not all questions are equal in their effectiveness. The way a question is framed can significantly impact the depth of the conversation. Open-ended questions invite expansive answers and deeper engagement. For instance, asking “What has been your biggest challenge in your (fill in the blank)?” fosters a richer discussion than a simple “Do you like your job?”

Intent is also crucial. Demonstrating genuine curiosity can create a space where honesty flourishes. When individuals sense that their responses are valued, they are more likely to engage openly. This reciprocity can lead to richer and more meaningful interactions. This is also true as we approach the throne room of God.

We should frame our questions with a desire for relationship – with God. We should focus on understanding Him. Instead of just seeking answers to problems, we must frame our questions in a way that seeks to know God’s character, His ways, and His heart.

Changing our perspective and focus to trusting in God will significantly improve and alter how we perceive situations, how we respond to challenges, and ultimately, experience the world. By shifting our focus to trusting in the Creator and embracing His promises, we unlock peace, growth, happiness, and resilience – our faith in God grows.

For example, instead of “Why is this happening to me?”, we could ask, “God, what does Your love look like in the midst of this difficulty?” or “Lord, help me to understand your faithfulness in this situation.”

Express Your Trust (even if it’s small): Even if we’re struggling, let us frame our questions with an underlying trust in God’s goodness, His sovereignty. God will meet us in that space of vulnerability. We could say, “God, I don’t understand this, but I trust that you are still good. Help me to see your hand at work.”
Make it a Conversation: Don’t just fire off a list of demands. Treat it like a conversation with someone we care about. Let us share our heart, our struggles, and then present our questions as part of that dialogue. As a parent, when a child (our child) is heartbroken and sobbing – in love, how do we generally begin – “…why don’t you tell me about it…” In Exodus 33:11 the Bible states that God spoke to Moses “face to face as a man speaks to his friend” – that is amazingly beautiful. This description highlights the intimate and close relationship between Moses and God. Moses was God’s friend. In ancient Near Eastern culture, friendship implied loyalty, trust, and mutual respect. This understanding of friendship helps us to interpret the meaning of the phrase.

Questioning in Education and Learning

Questioning extends well into education, where it plays a crucial role in fostering critical thinking. Educators understand that when students are prompted to ask questions, they become active participants in their learning. For example, classrooms that implement inquiry-based learning show a 30% increase in student engagement and retention compared to traditional methods.

Moreover, learning to ask the right questions can lead to innovation. By questioning assumptions and exploring alternatives, individuals can develop problem-solving skills. This approach makes learning more engaging and nurtures collaboration, allowing for the free exchange of ideas.

Questioning God can be a valuable tool for learning and growing in our faith, as it encourages seeking understanding and deepening our relationship with the Divine. It’s not a sign of disrespect but rather a form of dialogue and exploration, exemplified by figures like Abraham and Job who questioned God’s actions. By asking “what” instead of “why,” we can trust God’s wisdom and learn from challenging circumstances

We must be intentional in how we ask – seeking understanding and spiritual growth. We ask:

Through Prayer: Prayer is the primary way we communicate with God. Speak to Him directly, out loud or in our thoughts. There’s no special formula – just be yourself. With humility, we seek understanding, guidance, insights, and His wisdom for application or change.
Through Scripture: Sometimes, our questions might be answered or illuminated as we read and reflect on the Bible. Ask God to speak to you through His Word.
Through Journaling: Writing down questions can help clarify our thoughts and feelings. We can also reflect on potential answers or insights as we write.
In Silence: Create moments of quiet to listen for God’s still, small voice. Sometimes the connection comes in the stillness, not in a direct verbal answer.

Seeking Understanding and Wisdom: Many prayers in the Psalms are essentially questions directed at God, seeking guidance, comfort, or explanations. For instance, “Why, Lord, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Psalm 10:1). These aren’t necessarily rebellious questions, but rather a yearning for deeper understanding and connection.

Habakkuk: The prophet Habakkuk questioned God’s actions and sought clarification.
Abraham: Abraham negotiated with God on behalf of Sodom and Gomorrah, demonstrating the right to question.
Job: Job wrestled with God’s wisdom in the face of his suffering, demonstrating the struggle of faith.

The Psychological Benefits of Asking Questions

Engaging in questioning can also have significant psychological benefits. Research indicates that reflective questioning can lead to a 15% improvement in self-awareness. This kind of inquiry encourages individuals to examine their emotions and experiences more deeply, enhancing personal growth.

Furthermore, articulating one’s concerns through questions can help reduce anxiety. When people express their confusion, they often find clarity, which can significantly alleviate stress. Feeling heard and understood fosters a supportive atmosphere that boosts emotional well-being.

Expressions of Honest Doubt and Confusion: Think about figures like Job, who, in the face of immense suffering, doesn’t hold back from questioning God’s justice and reasons. His entire book is essentially a long, agonizing series of questions. Similarly, as shared earlier, prophets like Jeremiah and Habakkuk voice their bewilderment at God’s actions or inaction. These examples show that the Bible acknowledges the human struggle to understand God’s ways.

Encouraging a Culture of Curiosity

Promoting a culture of curiosity is essential in various settings, including home, school, or community spaces. Leaders, educators, and parents can nurture questioning by modeling curiosity. When children observe adults asking questions or sharing their own inquiries, they learn the importance of seeking knowledge.

Providing feedback on questions—whether validating or redirecting them—can reinforce the value of inquiry in learning. This guidance makes questioning an integral part of personal and social development.

A God-directed curiosity that seeks truth and understanding. While it acknowledges that curiosity can be a force for both good and evil, it also emphasizes the importance of seeking God and His truth, which requires a curious spirit.

God created humans with an innate desire to learn and explore, which is a natural part of development
This curiosity can be a tool for seeking deeper understanding of God and His creation
The Bible encourages people to “seek” God and to “ask” Him for knowledge and wisdom

The Evolution of Questioning in a Digital Age

In today’s digital world, questioning has evolved, impacting how we seek and share information. Social media allows people to ask and answer questions across the globe, creating connections that bridge geographic boundaries. For example, platforms like Quora have millions of active users generating discussions that center around diverse topics.

However, this digital shift also presents challenges. The overwhelming amount of information online can make it challenging to find credible answers. Thus, teaching critical thinking is essential. Individuals must learn to ask relevant questions and evaluate sources to navigate this complex landscape effectively.

Faith in the digital age involves navigating the intersection of spirituality and technology, finding ways to deepen faith and connect with others in a world increasingly reliant on digital platforms. This includes utilizing technology for spiritual growth, engaging in online faith communities, and addressing the challenges of digital distraction and potential manipulation. However:

The constant stream of information and the potential for addiction to social media can make it difficult to focus on spiritual practices and inner peace
The spread of misinformation online can undermine faith and create confusion.
Online interactions can become substitutes for real relationships and face-to-face interactions, potentially isolating individuals.

We must maintain a healthy balance between online and offline activities, we must stay in God’s Word in order to be continue to grow a true discerning faith.

Final Thoughts

God’s Responses (though not always direct answers): While God doesn’t always provide neat, easily digestible answers to every question, He often responds to those who sincerely seek Him. In the book of Job, God responds with powerful questions of His own, highlighting His sovereignty and the limits of human understanding. Other times, God answers through prophets, visions, or even direct intervention.

The intrinsic nature of questioning is crucial for human connection. It fosters understanding, empathy, and trust—key elements that nurture meaningful relationships. By actively asking questions—whether in casual conversations, educational environments, or self-reflective moments—we learn about others and ourselves.

Encouraging a culture of inquiry not only promotes personal growth but also builds a robust community where ideas thrive. Embracing the art of questioning illuminates pathways to deeper connections in a complex world.

Ultimately, connecting with God through your questions is about cultivating a heart that seeks Him genuinely. It’s about being honest, open, and trusting in His desire to be in relationship with you. He isn’t intimidated by your questions; in fact, they can be a powerful way to draw closer to Him.

Be Patient and Expectant:

Keep the Dialogue Open: Connection is ongoing. Continue to bring your thoughts, feelings, and questions to God, even after you feel you’ve received an answer. This deepens your relationship over time.

God’s Timing: Remember that God’s timing is not always our own. Be patient and persistent in seeking Him, but trust that He will answer in His own way and time.

Look for His Responses: God may answer your questions directly, but He might also respond through a feeling, a verse that stands out to you, a conversation with a trusted friend, or a prompting in your spirit. Be open to recognizing His voice in various forms.